I came across a clever soul on X, formerly known as Twitter, who cautioned big spenders like me to make the November salary stretch right up to the end of December. The person said the December salary must last you until the end of January. If you follow this advice, you will have an angst-free festive season. You also won’t need to raid your in-laws’ liquor cabinet or pantry for groceries.

Younger folks, if they listen to advice, will not be turned into ice boys by moreki (loaded person) and don’t have to be called a freegan as you accept every invitation to latch on to free drinks and grub. It’s cheaper to have fun on your own sometimes.

So how does one avoid raiding other people’s bars and pantries, scavenging for fortified drinks and frozen legs of lamb? 

Ignore the Black Friday noise. Do not allow yourself to be swept away by the festive season revelry. Do not give in to buy now and pay after three months ads. You need to draw up a budget as a matter of urgency. It will help you navigate the tricky terrain, which is the season not to be too jolly with your hard-earned money.

You can’t take a trip to Polokwane or Mbabane without consulting Waze or Google Maps. So what makes you think you’ll come out of Dezemba unscathed without a trusted budget to guide your spending and rein in your excesses?

What goes into a budget? All your expenses, even those you hide from your spouse or partner and all the income you receive must be listed on the budget. The left side will have your municipal bill, groceries, rent/bond, car payments, crèche fees, tithe, entertainment allowance, emergency fund and investments. The right will have your salary. If you have a side hustle, add it on the right side.

In an ideal world, the total on the left side should not exceed the right side. However, reality tells us something else. If the sides don’t balance nicely, you are in big trouble and need to call firefighters to douse your expenses fire. 

Steer clear of abomashonisa (loan sharks) and revolving credit from banks. Trim the entertainment allowance, buy fewer gifts or reuse old ones, raid your mom’s kitchen for some grocery items and pray that you come out of the happy season with fewer bruises.

I almost forgot, those relatives who dump their offsprings at your doorstep after schools close must bring groceries or give you money to feed their bundles of joy. If you are invited to a braai, don’t rock up empty handed. Bring a bottle of bubbly or some snacks. People won’t eat your sparkling personality. 

Yes, ‘tis the season to be jolly, but not with your money. Keep safe, spend wisely or not at all and happy holiday, folks.

By Mongadi Mafata
24/11/2023